Great Start to the Day!

Started out the day with a 15 minute conversation with D.A. Carson.  This is going to be a great day!  (Minus a Hebrew quiz on 31 chapters of vocab!  Boquer Tov!)

The Artist Chisels at the Stone

Thinking about these words from the band "downhere" today... 
The artist chisels at the stone...

Lord, help me be the one You're making me
Lord ,help me see the one You're making me...
I was a cancer, but you have made me a son

 God is doing something big in my heart these days.  Please pray that He would clarify my calling, stir His spirit within me, throw open doors of opportunity, and surround me with people who would spur me on toward fulfilling His desires for my life.  If you're reading this, know that I love you...and He loves you.

"Not So With You"

       Each day I try to begin my day with reading a few chapters of Scripture and praying for how God would have me respond.  In this, I have been using a reading plan/devotional book called For The Love of God by D.A. Carson, one of my professors here at Trinity.  The book has a reading plan to read through the whole Old Testament once, and the New Testament and Psalms twice in a year.  With each day, Dr. Carson gives a reflection or devotion on the reading.  This morning's NT portion was Matthew 20.  As I have been reflecting at great length on the health of the Church in America, Jesus' words particularly stood out to me.  Jesus says, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."  Dr. Carson points out that Jesus understands the nature of government power, that "absolute power corrupts absolutely" as Lord Acton said,  but also that unfortunately, this is often true of our church leaders.  Jesus says things are to be different among us.  Whoever wants to become great among us, must become a servant.  Why?  Because Jesus came to be the same.  Right away, I thought about what this means for leading well and leading with our gifts.  As if reading my thoughts (I know he can't do this...I know it seems I may think he can), Dr. Carson writes, "Becoming a slave of all most emphatically does not mean that leaders must become servile, stupid, ignorant, or merely nice--any more than Jesus' leadership and sacrifice were characterized by such incompetence."  So, we can lead with skill and gifts but the difference is that Christian leadership is to be "a self-denying sacrifice for the sake of others."  My favorite part of the devotion this morning was the conclusion.  Finishing his thoughts, Dr. Carson says, "So the church must not elevate people to places of leadership who have many of the gifts necessary to high office, but who lack this one...you must also be profoundly committed to principled self-denial for the sake of brothers and sisters in Christ, or you are disqualified."  I have been around a few of these profound, servant leaders in my life, a list that most certainly includes both of my parents.  They make you want to serve, they make you feel a sense of ownership for the mission of the Church, and they make you want to follow their example.  I pray for us, and ask you to pray for me, as I continue to follow God's call into ministry, that we will set an example of self-denial for the sake of others...so that we will not be disqualified.  For us that we would not seek the approval of people, or crowns on earth, but to seek to serve as Jesus did. 

Thorns and Thrones

One of the major themes that God has been laying on my heart is actually a question.  A question that has been echoing in my head for months...a question that I must answer every minute of every day.  As I begin this journey into pastoral ministry at Trinity, and I see the winding path of pride and self that litters my way--marked by the lives of leaders, both failures and successes.  In the midst of this journey, God asks me, "David...My kingdom or yours?"  I've been involved in a few churches in my life.  In some, the line between building the pastor's kingdom and God's is far too blurry.  With building campaigns and website front pages, it often seems as though the fame is indeed aimed at and received by a person...one that is not Christ.  Yet, when my heart hurts for ministries led in pride, I hear the ever present wisdom of my mother, echoing the words of Jesus: "First take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."  So I journey...knowing that with ministry comes a constant begging for an answer to God's question, "Your kingdom or mine?"  I ask God for humility and for clear eyes to see my calling as one of servanthood and self-sacrifice for God's glory, and not mine.
This is summed up well in a poem from B. J. Hoff titled "Thorns and Thrones."  It echoes the struggle in my heart for an easy path, and not the one of sacrifice.

I’d rather gather roses without thorns, Lord,

A bright and fragrant, beautiful bouquet

To decorate my world with pretty pleasures-

The brambles and the briers, I’ll throw away.

But You say I must pluck the thorns as well, Lord,

Although they’ll pierce my heart and sting my soul;

You say that pain’s a part of peace, You tell me

That breaking is a part of being whole.

You say that if I truly want to know You,

I must count everything but Christ a loss;

You ask me to exchange my way for yours, Lord

To trade contentment’s kingdom for a cross.

And so I come before you, weak but willing;

I seek to walk your path and not my own;

I choose to share the crown of thorns You wore, Lord

Until I kneel before your royal throne. 

This journey will involve thorns and thrones...with the constant longing for an answer to God's question:  "Will you build my kingdom or your own?" 

Hiatus Ended, Passion Refilled

Some of you may have noticed (and by some, I may only mean my Mom) that I took a hiatus from blogging.  Well, I hope to get back into it with a new batch of thoughts and ruminations from seminary life.  My first semester of graduate school was multifaceted--fulfilling yet lacking, life-giving and yet draining.  Having begun my grad school experience with a 6 week intensive Greek course, a one day break, and then the most intense semester of my life, by finals week I was ready to give my mind a break.  The week preceding finals and finals week itself were the most intense academic two weeks of my life--waking up around 5 am and closing shop around 11 pm.  In the intensity, the Lord taught me immensely and increased my love for His word greatly.  After a refreshing break of absolutely no studying, and even a little pleasure reading, I feel refilled and ready to enjoy all the Lord desires to teach me here at Trinity.  With that, I have finally landed at a church home, and have begun leading a small group of high school men at church.  Learning about God's word, when not grounded in real life experience, is void of any worth--thus I am excited to pour into the lives of young men, and to challenge them to a life of mission and purpose for the fame of Jesus.